Unravel Reality
by wontonss
Summary: She was Unraveling. The carnage that once struck fear into her was now what exhilarated her. Painstakingly, she turned her head around so she could meet his gaze. Things could never be the same. She realized that now. He was gone, and so was she. Tears flooded down her crimson-stained face. As she made her final plea, she never felt more alone. "Remember who i was…"
1. A Day at :Re

_**Hiya! Welp, i noticed a gross lack of Tokyo Ghoul Fanfics, so i figured that i'd contribute to the rising ****count! I own nothing! Nothing at All! It all goes to Ishida Sui (aside from the fic itself, but you knew that)! I hope you guys enjoy this story!**_

* * *

_"I… am a Ghoul Investigator…"_

The breeze was cold that night.

"_And I am their Mentor"_

Touka sucked in a breath of the bitter air, the frost filling her lungs, before she released it in white, chilled puffs. She pulled her hood up to shield her frozen ears from the touch of Jack Frost, hiding her hair from moonlight. Her palms were glove-clad, however, her fingers were exposed to the night, giving her cause to ball her calloused hands together, guiding them to her pale lips. She sighed a heavy breath into her interlocked fingers, warming them for a few seconds, before the chilly air attacked that heat. Squatting down, she surveyed down the side of the skyscraper, her eyes gliding down slick windows that reflected the life coming and going below. Not many people traveled the streets at this hour, especially not in this spine-chilling cold, or at this peculiar hour. Though it wasn't the cold, nor the dark that kept people off the streets at night. It was fear. Fear of Ghouls.

Fear of her.

After she came to the conclusion that she wasn't attracting any unwanted attention, she turned her gaze up to the night sky. Gray clouds hazed and muddled up the sky, leaving patches of grey against a glittering blue stretch. The Moon was floating high, and shone wholesome and bright, illuminating a path far above the streets of Tokyo. Suddenly, Touka broke into a sprint towards the opposite ledge of the building. Outstandingly, she sprung off the ledged and whirled her body around, successfully flipping around midair. Soon, her feet made contact with the solid roof of another, shorter building. With great agility, she glided rooftop to rooftop, the wind ripping at her dark coat, adrenaline pumping through her veins. The cold didn't matter right now, because one misstep would cause her to crash down to the distant at a breakneck speed. At this particular moment, she didn't feel like walking home with a broken neck.

Soon, she was away from the taller buildings, now trouncing on the tops of small shops. She launched herself off the ledge of what seemed to be a small convenience store, and latched onto an old street lamp. Expertly, she swung her legs into the air, causing her to whip around the pole as she descended. Then, mid-turn, she let go of the pole and landed gracefully in a squat on the cold stone of the sidewalk. Standing back up, she arched her back and brought her arm across her chest, holding it by the elbow with her opposing hand, stretching her now-sore limbs. She let out another white breathe as she began to stalk further from the streetlight and into the murky darkness of the nearby alleyways. Letting the cold sting her nostrils, chuckled inwardly.

"_Maybe I should have tried out for the Gymnastics team back in high school."_

That was her last sane thought as the blackness of the alleyway enveloped her.

* * *

"The Auction's in a couple of days now" Yomo said nonchalantly, as if to no one in particular. His eyes were glued to a white porcelain cup in his hands.

"Yeah" Touka replied, as she finished shining the countertop she had been polishing. "I guess it is"

Yomo didn't raise nor turn his head, but his eyes shifted from the cup to her, keen to any clue as to what the twenty-year old ghoul was thinking. She pretended not to notice.

"Are you planning on going?"

"Pardon?"

"To the auction."

Touka stood in her place for a minute, and then turned to look out the large windows behind her.

:Re was no Anteiku, that was to be certain. It had a modern feel that her old home lacked, but she felt her heart sink as remembered that the new café meant the burying of all she held dear. Everything in her old life that she worked so hard to build was gone.

Like him.

Sighing, Touka leaned back against the counter, letting her head fall back.

"I haven't decided yet"

Yomo shifted from his lax stance and placed the cup on the counter in front of him. With long strides, he traveled to the door, and paused. Silently, he traced his slender finger along the bottom of the 'OPEN' sign, as if he was contemplated flipping it and letting the world in, rather than manually doing it as they did everyday. Touka decided now was a good time to get some water boiling, and began to exit to the back of the building to prepare for the day.

"Touka"

She stopped in her tracks, and turned her head slightly to notion she was listening.

"Don't do anything stupid" He flipped the sigh, so the side that read 'OPEN' became visible to the passerby's on the streets outside.

Continuing, Touka lowered her head and silently responded to Yomo's concern.

"_I can't promise you anything"_

* * *

The day was monotonous as usual. Touka mindlessly served various patrons with many orders of coffees, lattes, and whatever else they could think of her to concoct. Throughout the day she half expected The Investigator and his crew to come barreling through the doors of the new café, carelessly pull up a chair and order their drinks while babbling about missions gone and coming. They never did of course. Part of her was happy about that.

She wasn't a fool, and neither was Yomo. They both knew the man with a messy head of white and black hair was Ken Kaneki, or whatever was left of him. The first time he came in, he was accompanied by a small group of apprentices, as he had stated later. She remembered them quite well, though it was only a pair at the time.

There was a tall man with the teeth of a shark and a head of fiery orange hair, accompanied by another smaller woman. Her nose was still as sharp as any other ghouls, and she could tell clearly that the green haired petite was a female, but it was obvious that the way she carried herself that she much preferred to be male. When she caught broken bits of their conversation, they referred to the tanned investigator as 'he', so Touka decided she would respect that. Later, she recalled running into the taller man at the hospital, with a tired-eyed girl with long blue hair, drawn back in two pigtails. It was clear by their scent that all four of them had some sort of ghoul in them, and the last thing Touka wanted to think about was why. The CCG had killed some other Ghouls and placed the organs in the new investigators, so they could carry on the destructive ways.

Touka strode to the back of the store as Yomo helped the last of the customers. Closing time was drawing near, and her head was in a fog. Trying to keep her wits about her, she drew some water into the sink, preparing to wash the day's dishes. Suds rose from the steaming water as she started to rub the stains away from the porcelain cups, readying them for another day of use. Her mind began to wander back to the Doves. They had three humans with the parts of ghouls killed by their vicious hand implanted in them. She wondered absent-mindedly if Kaneki knew what he was doing, wondered if this was his way to get back at an organization like Aoigiri for what they did to him.

No, not plausible.

Nishki had told her that he didn't remember anything. The way he freaked out when he called his name was evident of that. But that also meant that deep down, the ghoul-turned-investigator was still Kaneki.

Her grip on the cup tightened.

How did he forget? Did they hurt him at all? How would he react when he learned he's hunting down and mercilessly slaughtering those he used to care about? Will he ever be back?

Would he ever remember her?

There was a loud crack, and a sharp sting immediately lashed up Touka's fingers. Red stained shards of porcelain fell limply from the ghoul's lacerated fingers and splashed into the soapy pond below. Crimson droplets trained down after them, tainting the water, as they slipped off her fingers like rivers.

A normal human with nothing special about their senses wouldn't have even had a clue about the predicament, but before Touka herself could even register what had just transpired, Yomo was at her side, immediately grabbing her trembling arms and yanking her away from the sink, now filled with the offending bloodstained glass. She couldn't even look up at him, she was shaking so bad. Her senses went crazy. She could smell then last remaining guests in the front of the building, and her mouth watered. The urge to break free from Yomo's grip and chase them down hit her like a brick wall. Bile rose in her throat as she thought about consuming them, ripping them limb from limb and sucking the bones dry.

"-ka! Touka, Look at me!"

Her eyes snapped up the silver-haired ghoul numbly gripping her arms. It became that he was gripping her with extreme force, as she felt his fingers practically pierce her flesh. She thanked the heavens for that, because if she had decided to follow her fantasies…

She immediately put the thought to the back of her mind.

In the end, Yomo had went back to help the customers at the front, hastily apologizing, making up some bogus story to excuse his actions. Touka was in the bathroom, running her shredded hands under cold water, watching the crimson flow down the drain. Reluctantly, she peered up at the mirror. Noticing that her Kakugan was clearly visible, her limbs once again began to shake violently. What happened? Why was she reduced to this pitiful state? What blew her composure?

Tears filled her eyes as she concluded that it was, indeed, Kaneki.

Would he even want to come back? Compared to his time spent at Anteiku, he's been with the CCG for much longer, and must have grown attached to them. That's what Kaneki did, made friends wherever he went. Where they his family? Did they love him as much as she did? More, perhaps? When he walked in with his students, he seemed so proud. If he didn't remember his life at Anteiku, does that mean he didn't remember al the atrocious things that happened to him? He seemed like he was more of his old self…

Was he happy?

Touka's frail body flung to the ground, ruby's staining the white tile of the bathroom floor. Hot tears bled from her eyes, and she furiously pressed her wounded hands to her face, staining her snowy skin with streaks of red. Painting the floor with blood and tears, Touka collapsed into to a pitiful sobbing heap, agonizingly tried to stifle her wails until she fell into a cold, dark, dreamless sleep.

All Yomo could do was silently lean on the door and listen to her muffled cries.


	2. Hide

**Hey, all! I really appreciated those ****who've vowed and enjoyed my story! We're slowly picking up steam, I hope you enjoy this next chapter!**

"I heard the Auction really blew up"

Two ghouls had been muttering about the cursed event, and how the whole thing was cracked wide open by the CCG as they sipped their lattes. One, with caramel brown hair that fell to her mid back, tied into a tail near the end, and hazel eyes, that were warm and welcoming. She reminded Touka of Hinami's mother. The other had bleached hair that reached the ends of her shoulder blades and was stylishly straightened. Her eyes were a cool azure that could heat the blood of any man. The two women were regulars.

"T-Touka-san… are you getting enough rest? You look deathly tired," the caramel-haired ghoul stammered with concern.

Touka only smiled and bowed slightly. "Yes, I've been sleeping fine. Thank you for you concern."

The blonde ghoul piped in. "How about… uh… eating? Have you been eating well?"

She didn't answer, but averted her slit eyes to catch a glance of Yomo, as she straitened her back.

"Oh. No no, Touka-san! You need to eat! How is such a pretty girl like you going to stay elegant if you don't eat!?"

After giving the two girls a sham of a promise that'd she'd maintain her diet, she proceeded to the back to make a few other orders she had taken before hand.

The red lashes no longer marred the flesh on her fingers. Not even the light pink evidence of a scar had remained, but the incident was still fresh in her mind.

The wounds had taken the greater part of the hour to heal. She also lost herself to her senses when she smelt the humans in the front.

While she did miss Kaneki dearly she couldn't give him all the credit for her outburst. She hadn't eaten in over four months, and while she dealt with the hunger well, it was beginning to take toll on her body. Healing was slower, and her senses would dull right down, or sharpen immensely, overpowering her with a bloodlust that would strike fear into the hearts of even the highest ranks of Investigators. She had a shorter attention span, and she couldn't focus. Her mind would wander backwards, to Anteiku, Kaneki, and even as far back as her father. Or, her mind would have the most random or most gruesome of thoughts.

She looked out into the Café's parlor.

_'Coffee smells good'_

_ 'so do they"_

_ 'I wonder how Yomo is doing with this much human contact, never was a talkative guy' _

_ ' Why's purple purple?_

_ 'Rize sucked. Tsukiyama too'_

_ "Haven't seen him around here though'_

_ "What would that lady look like with her intestines wrapped around her head?'_

Boiling water suddenly attacked her hands, causing her to quickly set down the kettle, and snap her back to reality.

_ "_Shit!" she cussed aloud, but thankfully, no heads tuned. Sulking, she brought her abused fingers to her mouth. Scalding water had overflowed from the cup she was pouring in, making a mess of the counter. Sighing, she grabbed a rag for a neighboring rack and cleaned the spill.

"Touka-san! Touka-san!" the regular with the blonde hair called, Touka's head whipped to attention.

"Kyotomo- wants to date you, Touka-san!"

The two girls burst into a fit of giggles as a nearby boy turned beet red and sunk his face into a nest of arms on his table.

Touka smiled softly. The display reminded her of the first time she met Kaneki at Anteiku. The two ghouls boisterous declaration made her feel nostal-

Oh.

She should probably go visit Hide.

* * *

The rest of the day proceeded without incident.

"No smashed cups today?" Yomo joked half-heartedly, sensing that Touka was in a good mood. She shrugged on her coat and hummed a light note in response to his poke. She turned around and he tugged at the fabric if the ashen jacket, in doing so, inquiring about her destination.

"To Hide" she responded fastening the buttons. "Not sure when I'll be back, so don't wait up"

Yomo only looked at her, a lazy expression in his eyes. Touka spun on her heels and opened the café's front door, letting a cool breeze if fresh air sweeps past her. Just as she stepped out, Yomo called after her.

"Touka, be careful"

She turned her head to look at him over her shoulder, a gentle smile forming on her lips, pressed together to hum out that light-hearted note once more.

The walk to the hospital was peaceful. The sky was painting with the blood of a dying sun, splashed with orange and reds, with purple and pink-tinged clouds. The air was crisp and relaxing, a light breeze tussling her hair about her pale face. She filled her lungs with the scent of the perishing day, allowing herself to relax. No thoughts muddled her mind, and she seemed to have good self-control right now. The dog-like hunger that gnawed at her seemed to be a distant ailment at the moment, and she was set on taking advantage of it.

Where she wound up was the last place she expected. She didn't really have any side destinations in mind, but she found herself on the bridge where she last saw Kaneki as Kaneki. The last time she saw him, She had beat him and said horrible things, screaming at him to never return. Her head dropped to her hands, as tears welled in her eyes and slipped down her face.

"I didn't mean it…" she whispered brokenly into her palms. A sense of hollow loneliness crept over her.

First her mother and father killed by the cold-hearted investigators.

Then Ayato sinking his teeth into the flesh of revenge and joining Aoigoiri tree.

And then Kaneki left.

Then Yoshimura and the rest of Anteiku fell.

Then Nishki and Hinami.

Not even Tsukiyama came around anymore. Touka furiously rubbed her eyes, as a ray of sunlight illumined her delicate features. No, she still had Yomo and Hide. She didn't care if everyone else left; she had to focus on what she had.

She had to focus on :Re, and she had to do anything to protect it.

She just hoped that what she was doing wouldn't endanger it more.

* * *

"Touka-chan! You're as lovely as ever!" The golden-haired boy called from his bed.

"Thank you, Hide, you look well" Touka smiled and bowed ever so slightly in salutation. One thing about Hide she envied was how he could look so up beat when he was hurting so badly.

He was perked right up; basically bouncing up and down on the bed, drool slipping from the corners of his mouth.

"Do you have something for me, Touka-chan?"

Her eyes darkened as she handed him an opaque white bag, and her stomach flipped as he tore it open and devoured the flesh in the bag in three savage gulps.

"I must admit" Touka started, taking the shredded bag and storing it in her coat pocket " You've taken this so much better that Kaneki did"

"If I eat up now, I'll be strong enough to get out of this joint. I'm always nervous, If I'm found out... Well… this place is crawling with investigators as is! Besides…" He laughed skittishly, then averted his eyes to his sheet clad knees, hand running through his sunny hair, smile melting into a sad, understanding one. "If Kaneki-Kun and Touka-chan could live like this for so long, then ghouls cant really be so bad."

Hide's eyes stayed glued to the bed in front of him and Touka's traveled to the window on the opposing corner of the room. The dying sun was sinking below purple clouds, and stars began to litter the sky above. It was Hide who broke the silence, talking about anything and everything, hopping straight into cheerful conversation until way past the sunset.

"Thanks for visiting me Touka-Chan! I really appreciate it!"

Touka hummed " Mm. You still have the address to :Re in case you get discharged, right?"

"You bet I do! If I get released it's the first place I go, no side stops!"

"Then goodnight, Hide, get well. Stay strong"

"You too, Touka-chan"

* * *

The night was illuminated by the streetlights, aiding the eyes in detecting what the night could hide. It was cold night, but that wasn't what sent shivers up Touka's spine.

It was a shriek coming from the shadows.

Her ears lead her to a gruesome scene. A young girl, a chunk of flesh was missing from her shoulder, but she was writhing away from her tormentor on the bloody, dirty ground of the alleyway. Without a second thought, the shorthaired ghoul flung herself in front of the girl. A scraggly, grimy-looking ghoul approached fro the darkness. He was disheveled, unshaven, and smelled downright foul.

"What d'we gots here" his ragged voices sounded like it was sawing at his throat to get away from his wretched vocal chords. "Two for one? Hehe… I like this!" His laughter made Touka want to vomit on his shoes.

"Run"

The girl locked up at Touka, her bleached hair stained with blood and fat tears rushing down her terrified face.

"W-wh-"

"Go. NOW"

Touka had snapped, as her own instincts were becoming harder to ignore. The girl needed to go. Thankfully, she had that sense, and was gone, leaving a trail of crimson in her wake.

"Arrrgh!" the male ghoul hissed. "Ya made me lose my dinner!

He charged at her, and she ducked under his arms, bringing her leg around to kick the ghoul backwards. He slid and tumbled, the impact casing his nose to bleed.

"Aye, bitch! First ya let my dinner get away, and then ya batter me? " A rinkaku erupted from his back. Touka thought it would have been cute if it weren't so pathetic. Was he really trying to threaten her with this?

"Yer gunna pay fer this! I'm hungry as hell and I ain't starving no more! You gots any clue how awful it is ta' be this hungry, ya crazy bitch?"

Fear seeped into the air and hung like a heavy fog, as a voice that didn't even sound like Touka's hissed from her throat. Her eyes grew wide as her Kakugan seized them.

"You have No Idea"

Darkness ensued.


	3. Slow Burn

**Hiya! I'm back! thanks for all the interest you guys are showing my story! I'm sorry if tin seems slow-going, but i promise you, i have ****plenty of surprises in store for you guys! Anywho, i finished this chapter, so may was well share it, right? Please enjoy, and know that i only one the plot!**

* * *

Yomo hardly recognized the monstrosity that had staggered through :Re's doors, so late at night.

It wasn't the stench of the blood that stained Touka's once-grey coat, nor the disheveled appearance of the younger ghoul. It was the sickly smile that twisted her stained face into a grotesque nightmare. A shiver ran up his spin, raising every hair on his neck. She almost reminded him of Rize… but he'd expect this of Rize.

On Touka, this madness was ill fitting and downright horrifying.

He was hesitant to move, as the demonic shell of the ghoul posing as his sister, raised her eyes to meet his, her Kakugan burning into his own coal eyes. She was holding back giggles, and failing to do so quite awfully. Soon, the giggles were full blow guffaws, their wicked sound reverberating of the walls of the dark café. Yomo's blood ran cold, in anticipation of what the next step of this insanity was to bring. She tried to speak though her laughter, but the sentences were choppy and illegible. He couldn't make heads or tails of what she was saying, until her laughter drawled to a slow halt, in which she remained passively silent for a moment. If Yomo wasn't a ghoul, he might not have even heard her whisper.

"I killed him" A single tear ran down her face, and she suddenly lurched forward.

His instincts kicking in, he dove forward to catch the young ghoul. She buried her tearful, bloody face into his shoulder upon impact and began to sob hysterically.

"I killed Him!" she cried repetitively "I killed Him! I killed him!"

He drew her closer, as her white-knuckled fists fastened their already impossible grip in his shirt. It was a vain effort to calm her down.

"I killed him! I killed him and ate him! I sucked the bones dry! And he wasn't even good!"

"Shh. Shh. It's over now. Shh." The silver-haired man coaxed quietly, rubbing soothing circled on her back as her wails turned into soft whimpers. Yomo let out a sigh as he let the tortured ghoul cry in his shoulder.

"You're going to be alright now"

He hated it. He knew that what Touka was doing was dangerous, towards herself especially, but she had implored him to trust her. Not that something as idle as a few words would stop her from doing what she believed to be right, but she needed someone to be her corner, and seeing as neither of them had anyone else, he knew that he had to give her what he had.

He'd help her stand until there was nothing left to stand for.

* * *

Touka scrubbed furiously with a detergent stick to get the last of the crimson out of her once-pristine coat. The wicker waist-bin held three emptied corpses of the blessed sticks, every last drop drained from each one.

She really wished that her inner beast would show restraint before it soiled her nice coat.

It had taken the greater part of the hour to get the blasted stains out, and Touka immediately washed the ashen jacket, before any other misfortune could befall its pure fabric. There was a soft rap at the doorway.

"We have a special guest today." Yomo informed. Sighing heavily, Touka swiftly headed for the doorway. There's only one soul they would let in this early before hours. At a table in then center of the floor sat a tall man, his hair dyed an inky black, his eyes and aura matching. Noticing her presence, the man sat up quickly, and cleared his throat.

"Touka-san"

"Amon. Good Morning." She smiled brightly. There was a time she would have paid any price to shred the ex-investigator to ribbons and promptly feast on the remains, but a lot had changed since Mado and his flock had come chewing through the 20th ward, killing Hinami's mother. The death of the old investigator may have haunted her, but she didn't regret putting that wretched being out his misery. Amon was a different man now, though.

Laughing to herself, she shook her head. They all were. Nothing could be the same anymore. Noticing the brooding mans hard stare, she smiled and looked directly into his coal eyes.

"Cup of coffee, Amon? No doubt Yomo's preparing breakfast, if you dare call it that." The older mans shoulders went lax, and he leaned back a little.

"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks"

Amon's eyes never left the baristas back, and guilt gnawed at his skull. He shouldn't be here. He shouldn't be alive, even, but definetly not here. His gaze intently followed the Rabbit; the Ghoul that had killed his friends, and his beloved mentor.

Never in a million years of his miserable life did he ever imagine himself grateful that she did.

The saying was true, that you can't understand someone until you've walked a day in their shoes, and now that he was walking in a ghouls shoes, he felt like absolute shit. After the initial shock of becoming what he despised, he had asked many questions, to come to terms with the transformation. Touka-san and Yomo-san had been patient, and readily helped him, answering each question with complete, and in most cases, brutal honesty. He knew all about their suffering. Hell, he was experiencing it first hand. He'd been trained in combat for the majority of his life and he was scared shitless. It was hard to even think about living a life like this. His heart sunk as he noticed a repeating trend with most ghouls.

"What about your parents, Touka-san?" he had asked her once.

He never forgot the look on her face. It was soft, peaceful;, but so fragile, as if a gust of wind could draft through the door and blow her away like ash on a mountainside.

"Killed, when I was young" was all she had said. He couldn't bring himself to press the matter any further. He wanted to ask so much. About Anteiku, and about Centipede, but that delicate look had struck a fear into him. He knew she was no piece of delicate china. If anyone could take care of herself, it was Touka-san. But that look had made him realize that these topics were rooted within her hear, and he didn't want to be the one to rip them up.

He was snapped out of his reverie by a steaming, aromatic cup of coffee.

"Here you go. One Café Romano, as you usually take"

"Thanks, I appreciate it." His eyes sunk to the table just in front of the now-seated woman. A heavy air hung over them as he tried to materialize what to say.

"Hide's doing well" Touka, the savior she was, brought the conversation to a start.

"Thank god. I owe him my life" Memories flashed in front of his eyes, causing the hair on the back of this neck to stand and his spine to shiver. The last think he wanted was to think about what happened then. He saw Aoigiri tree in a new, even more malicious light. He sipped his coffee, the warm brew washing his pallet and cleansing his mind. Damn, Touka-san was good at this.

"Will he be discharged soon?"

"Well, if he's feeling good, why would they keep him? Let's just hope he isn't found out until then" the ghoul tilted her head, flashing him one of those priceless smiles. It wasn't that Amon had developed an infatuation with the younger woman. He hadn't the head for romance. What he felt for Touka-san was a deep admiration of her strength and person, even after all this hell on earth had put her through. Not to mention what she was putting herself through now, to protect :Re, and the helpless ghouls like him.

Yomo had impeccable timing, because just as the last of his Romano was gone, he came out baring a package. Amon had accepted the parasol and bid a good and easy day to the two experienced ghouls. As he left the Café, he flipped the 'OPEN' sign on the request of Touka. The morning air was fresh, and the ex-dove pulled up his hood as he started down the sidewalk, package tucked away in the bosom of his long, dark coat.

"It's just down this way! The coffee there is so good it made Sassan Cry!"

"Wait, I didn't cry!"

"Those were big, fat teardrops on your face"

"Mutsuki! You're not helping!"

"What, Mamaan was crying over cup of coffee? Really?"

"Could we please just-"

The white and black haired man paused as a tall, hooded figure passed him, his hair jet black, and his eyes shaded to match. It caused him to double take.

"Hey, are you ok?"

"Yeah, I just… It's nothing, let's just keep going"

He could have sworn he'd seen that face before.

* * *

Life was hardly a fairytale. Any ghoul knew that. It was a lifelong struggle, which required killing and eating people you didn't want to harm just to survive. The part that scared Touka Kirishima was the fact that it was getting so easy. To watch the blood drain from their body, and the light fade from their eyes, it was terrifying.

She didn't want to lose herself.

She didn't want to lose what she had.

That's the whole reason she was doing this. She only hoped that she didn't take it to far. She had no time to feel fear. Too many people depended on her now.

Yomo, Hide, Amon, they all needed her. They needed her, and dammit, if she was going to do something, now had to be the time.

She knew Kaneki was lost to her, but she wouldn't make the same mistake twice.

The cafe's front door swung open once more.


	4. Smile

**Yo, Yo, Yo! Chapter 4 has arrived! Thanks once more to those who are enjoying my ****story! A special thanks to those who review! Your feedback helps me more than ****you might think! As always, i own nothing but the plot, yo! Enjoy!**

* * *

They did as they usually did. They'd laugh and tease through the door and traveled in a small herd to the same table, throwing quips and harmless insults. She was torn. Her heart wanted to scream and cry, and beat his memory back into him, to draw him back out. In her head she wanted to cleave his head off right there, rip off his limbs and scream at him. Scream at him for breaking his promise and becoming the one thing she despised more than herself.

She didn't know when she started to feel so violent towards him, but she had an idea of why.

Yomo had beaten her to service today, which she was grateful for. An icy lump built in her throat, and she leaned on the wall, just out of sight. Chest constricting, her memories of Kaneki breezed through her head. She remembered him, the goof he was, with his dark hair, trying to cope, so innocently, to a world that would rather chew him up and spit him out. Then his white hair, tussling in the wind and he walked away.

"I won't be returning to Anteiku"

She let out a breath, eyes widening as a warm wave washed over her, and she smiled. Not a fake smile, a genuine smile. Her lips didn't even tremble as she turned from behind the wall, and look straight at an unwitting Haise Sasaki, engaging with his subordinates. Letting out a forlorn sigh, she began towards Yomo, intent on helping him with the orders.

Touka knew what she had to do.

Yomo had nothing less of utter shock adorning his pale face as she decided to take the four cups to the nattering group, but he didn't question it. His eyes were trained on her as she headed towards the occupied table, scrutinizing her closely. Touka payed him no mind, and kindly placed the cups in front of each customer.

"Hey! It's Shirazu's girlfriend!"

Sasaki Haise nearly spit his coffee everywhere

"H-Hey! Don't go spreading around rumors, Saiko!"

"Sasaki? Breathe!"

The viridian investigator placed his hands on the half-ghouls shoulders, as he seemingly started choking for no reason. The other two averted their attention to the coughing man, and for a moment, all eyes were on the disturbance. Haise's eyes watered as his coughing slowly subsided as he let the air return to his lungs. He wiped the fat tears blurring his vision and immediately looked up at smiling barista in front of his table.

Dammit, he must have looked like a real moron.

The fact that her lips remained curved upward made him a tad uneasy, but he decided not to overthink it. Instead, he drowned himself in his coffee, blocking out the rest of the world, letting his wandering mind in a distant feeling of nostalgia.

* * *

Touka's gut was never wrong. She had a nose for trouble, and particularly the trouble made by others. Just an hour after :Re's doors had closed, she had an uneasy feeling. Out of habit, walked the path down to the 20th ward, mind ablaze. Every time she saw Haise Sasaki, her mind reeled, just thinking about the man he used to be.

The man the world had failed.

For two years she had waited. Two whole, agonizing years, and now she knew of Ken Kaneki's final resting place, within the pure Sasaki. At first she didn't know what to do, or how she would 'save' him. It tore her apart to realize she couldn't save him, as someone beat her to it.

Ken Kaneki was given a second chance at life. A chance to have a somewhat normal, and maybe even peaceful existence. One without torture, without looking over his shoulder, without little girls that punch him and tell him awful things.

She would be dammed if she took that from him, and she would be double dammed if anyone else had the audacity to try. She was going to protect Haise.

For Kaneki.

Looking off in to the sunset, she realized she was on that bridge again. Sucking in a big breath of air, a feeling of acceptance sunk into Touka like a hit stone, searing her very being. Once more time

"No… not lost..." she whispered to herself

"I gave it away..."

It sounded easier that way, even if she didn't believe it herself. A cool, quiet breeze tussled her hair, cautious, as if it were scared to blow her away.

For the first time, Touka Kirishima didn't cry.

In spite of herself, she laughed.

The moment of peace didn't last. A shriek was heard, just nearby, and her nose flared. Her intuition once more proved correct, and her nostrils flared.

She smelt trouble all right, a particular brand she was not particularly fond of.

* * *

"Now, now! Where are you going, Kaetzchen?" the servant slunk through he alleyway, a playful gleam in his eye. Upon hearing a shuffle behind him, he spun around, Rinkaku flailing.

"Meow!"

The tentacle smashed a crate to pieces, and the dark-skinned investigator crouched even lower. His attempts to run had alerted his pursuer as to his location. Fearful he curled up into a ball, hoping he could stay hidden long enough to heal his wounds. Little did he know that a shadow was looming above him ready to strike, and his face squished in his hands had provided no help to the situation. A smile marred the devoted servants face, and he closed in on his prey.

"Here, kitty, kitty, kitty…"

Mutsuki flinched when she heard a sickening thump, but realizing that the pain he was expecting was absent, snapped his head up. He was just in time to see the dark boots of a shadow-clad figure smash into Kanae's skull.

"Woof"

The young quinx was about to throw himself over the remaining boxes to see if he could help, but jerked back as soon as he saw the ruby glow from under his saviors hood.

The purple-haired ghoul struggled to raise himself. the blow left him disoriented, but it was a vain effort. The heel was brought down on his back. After the sharp crack of his now twisted arm, and a cry of pain, the ghostly ghoul had thrown the offender down the alleyway. He crashed into a horde of crates, which tumbled around him. It made a large commotion in the dark alleyway.

Everything was still, and slowly, Mutsuki peeked out from behind his refuge.

"U-umm…" his throat was paralyzed. What was he doing talking to a ghoul? Was it going to kill him? Did it know that he was there?

A pair of red eyes darted to his spot.

Well, now it did.

"Y-y-you saved my l-life….." He decided that he would try convincing the ghoul that it had saved him, and maybe into sparing him. He was in no condition to fight, and one sharp blow to the head had rendered his pursuer invalid, with no Kagune in sight. The ghoul took a step towards him, and he panicked.

"Th-th-th-than-n-nk-k y-you…..!"

The ghoul hummed a low note and sighed.

"Get outta here"

Well shit, you didn't have to ask him twice. Running as fast as his wounded body would let him him, Mutsuki made a beeline to the nearest road, trying not to piss himself in the process.

Touka only chuckled as she watched the terrified investigator scramble away. He was pathetic sure, but he was still pretty innocent compared to most. She envied that. Her smile was wiped away immediately as she heard a groan and some rustling behind her. She cleared the distanced between her and the pale man slave in no time at all, seizing this amethyst-stained-red-locks and yanking him to eye level. He snarled like a rabid dog and she only twisted her hand, further tugging his hair. her knuckles were white.

"So I hear you have a pussy problem?"

The trapped ghoul spat in her face.

"Schlamp..!"

The rabbit ghoul's eye twitched as she wiped the bloody saliva from her face with her free hand, letting out a long, exhausted sigh. Then she began to feed him the concrete.

Six times she had smashed his miserable yet sturdy skull into the pavement, and a bloody hole was beginning to form itself on the point of impact. She crouched and pulled back his head so she could yell into his ear.

"Alright, Schiesskopf! It just so happens that I have a favor I need from you!" When he gurgled defiantly, she forced his nose into the cracked ground. "Let me rephrase that. Unless you want your brain matter in this hole, you're going to take me to Tsukiyama."

Knowing she had won, she dropped his head and watched him struggle to stand. The bludgeoned ghoul started to hobble forth, and Touka followed closely.

She could hardly contain her urge to laugh uncontrollably.


	5. Moving On

**Hi guys! SOrry for the ridiculously long, unannounced hiatus, but I've been a busy bee! it also let me keep up with the Manga, seeing What plot points i might want to ****acknowledge in the future! any who, you guys aren't here to read my incessant blubbering, you're here to see the new chapter, so enjoy!**

* * *

The Gourmet didn't even turn his head as his faithful servant was dragged, his hair bunched in the young woman's fist. Touka, with a heave, threw the squirming mass towards the passive ghoul, and she heard a small gurgle emit from the bloody mess on the floor before her. Slowly, and painstakingly, his head turned, and he showed no slight of emotion regarding the sight of poor Kanae, trying to raise himself to his feet. Rather, his gaze was fixed on the younger ghoul, and Touka stood still under his intense stare. His eyes grew impossibly wide at the sight of her.

"Touka…"

It was almost an inaudible whisper, and Tsukiyama slowly stumbled to his feet.

The last person Touka ever thought her heart would bleed for was the Gourmet, but seeing him now was a slap in the face. He wasn't even annoying anymore, he was just…pitiful.

His eyes were sunken into two black holes in his skull, and red, as if he'd been crying, but no tears were present. It seemed they had been long since dried up. In the dark room, he stuck out like a ghost, as he was white as a sheet, and his normally to-tight-for-everyone's-comfort shirt was disgustingly bagged on his skeleton figure.

"Tsukiyama"

The elder ghoul glanced towards the now standing Kanae, who had thrown himself on front of his master,

"You won't lay a single one of you're dirty paws on Master Shuu!" he rasped out, snarling fiercely. Tsukiyama stepped back a touch, face shaped in an aloof expression of surprise. Something itched in Touka. A Beast of sorts, clawing at her skull, as her heart began to beat faster. The servant Ghoul Lunged at her, and she sprung back, Kakugan flickering in her now-cold eyes. Her lips twitched into a sick smile, as she wasted no time charging into her aggressor, slamming him to the ground, the sickening crack of his ribs and his tormented moans played like music to her ears.

Heel sturdily placed on his chest, she bent to look him in the eye, taunting him.

"Stay down, boy. Maybe you'll get a treat "

"You've changed" a smaller voice, which bused to hold so much presence rang out. Tsukiyama walked towards the crazed young woman. She reeked of blood lust, and her eytes were that of a wild beast. "There no warmth in your eyes… nor is there ice... Just… blackness.

Spitting out a giggle, Touka removed her foot from Kanae's shattered ribcage, allowing him to slink far enough away to not be in the way of the pair, but not far enough to leave his master. The rabbit ghoul stood before the Gourmet, a broken smile gracing her graceful, and once-again sane features.

"Noir est tout ce qui reste" she said, not breaking eye contact with the taller ghoul.

"You've been brushing up on your French?"

"Yeah" Touka sucked in a breath, and braced her muscles for a fight. She didn't know hoe the man before her would take the news she bore.

"Kaneki's body is still alive"

His eyes rivaled the moon in size, that dry well once more flowing with a rush of tears wasting no time pouring themselves the Gormet's face.

"A-alive?! Kaneki-kun is-"

"Dead. His body is alive. He no longer remembers us, who he was." She swallowed a lump "he's a ghoul investigator now. He has a family of sorts. He's… happy"

Her muscles tensed as he stared towards her, closing the distance between them tears drifting down his now dreamlike face. To her utter shock, he wrapped his arms around her, and pulled her close to him, envelope her in a warm hug.

"Then there is nothing we can do, then"

Touka's lip twitched as she breathed in his scent. Her stomach was lurching, but she wasn't going to cry. She had to steel her nerves, as her purpose had not been fulfilled yet. Pushing off the ghoul's body, she tilted her head to stare him dead in the eye. Morning light peered in from a nearby window.

"Look, the real reason I'm here is too..."

Tsukiyma tilted his head curiously, eyes encouraging her to proceed.

"Tskiyama Shuu, I'm here to offer you a job."

* * *

"Are you coming, Amon-kun?"

"Remind me why I'm doing this again?"

"C'mon, Amon-kun! Touka-chan's been nice enough to give us a job, a place to stay, and a meal plan! We're doing this to pay her back!"

The dark haired half-ghoul scratched the back of his head warily

"I don't see how dying our hair ridiculous colors is going to help us repay our debt to Touka-san"

"Hey, Touka used to have the prettiest black hair, but since Anteiku, she had to dye it in order to hide! Now, not that is doesn't look good on her, because it looks totally beautiful, but blue is a drastic change, don't you think?" the sunny-haired ghoul asked, knowing full well the answer.

"When it was white, it was bad, but we already dyed it back to how it was!"

"What if someone recognizes us? I hate to say it, but I don't want to run into any of our friends from the CCG friends anytime soon. Or ever"

Amon rubbed his temples, knowing that Hide was right. Touka had given them everything. He couldn't risk on of the investigators coming into the shop and recognizing him on a glance. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if a single ghoul at that shop were hurt because of him. He just wished Hide would tell him what color he was going to dye it.

"Hey, are you Amon?"

The ex-investigator jumped as a pretty young stylist stuck her head into the waiting area.

"I-is it my turn?"

"That's what the schedule says. Right this way!"

Amon felt a stone drop into the pits of his stomach, and he looked back to Hide, who was giving him a duel thumbs up with a big grin.

Great.

* * *

If you asked him what he was doing, Mutsuki would tell you he had no fucking idea.

Sasaki was healing from the events at the Auction that happened almost a week prior, but it left him with big emotional welts, that seem to be haunting him so. Mustuki wanted it to die. To all die, for that crazy ghoul to leave her alone, for the image of the huge lady Ghoul to fade.

For him to sleep at night.

He hadn't slept since the auction, and knew that the ghoul that saved him in the alleyway last night wasn't going to leave his mind. He certainly didn't tell anyone about it. He just imagined what the others would say.

"_You were saved by a ghoul? Lets kill it!"_

"_That crazy ghoul is still following you?" let's ramp up your protection!"_

"_You pissed yourself?"_

Groaning, he plopped his hands into his knees, alarming Shirazu in the couch above him.

"You alright man?"

"I could use a coffee, really, so i'm going to get one"

"oh, uhh, want some company?"

"Nah, I'll bring you guys some back. It's still really early, so try get some more rest I guess."

The morning air was fresh outside the bureau, and Mutsuki relished it. His own little slice of peace, walking by himself in the morning.

Sighing to himself, he started in the direction of :Re.

* * *

The walk home was a peaceful one. Touka was able to get back in good time, so she was able to help prepare for the day. An orange sun rose and peered through the skyscrapers and into :Re's large front window. She sat down with her coffee. Yomo called from the back room.

"Hide's out of the hospital, him and Amon will swing by later. I'm sure you can get them situated, then."

"Yeah" she called back, "Tsukiyama is coming too, that should be good enough to start us off"

A grunt was her only response, and the silver-haired ghoul traveled to the front of the building, back to that OPEN/CLOSE sign. His hand lingered, as it did every morning, with apparent hesitation.

Touka looked out the window, letting the sunshine in her eyes and caress her soft blue hair. A warm feeling bubbled in her chest, and she smiled again. It was going to be a good day.

Yesterday, she let go.

Today, she'd move on.

Yomo flipped the sign.


End file.
